China Adoption....Our Journey to Jaden

This is a creek?! They didn't make creeks like this when I was a kid...

On Saturday we received a call from Hunter and Morgan's Mom.  "Would you and Kevin like to go down to the creek with the girls and I?"  Creek, warm sunny day, pick up my girl at the same time...Sure!  My sister was over using the computer and I told her I'd be back in about a half an hour.

Kevin and I arrived at their house ready to walk down to the creek and we found Hunter, Morgan and Valerie gearing up.  I was smart enough to have boots for all of us.  Kevin and I had jackets on but all of the other kids were in short sleeves.  Okay, it's sort of warm out.  I'll keep my mouth shut. 

We walked down to the creek and it's big!  At least compared to what we have on our property and compared to the creeks I grew up with.  It's more like a small river.  By the time that Kerrie and I got down to where the kids were this is what I saw.  They were running across the creek!  Soaked up to their knees!  What did you say?  The temperature?  Oh, it was 53 degrees.  Short sleeves, soaking wet up to their knees and 53 degrees!  I'm so city.....where's the blankets?  No one seemed to notice that it was cool out but me! 

Kerry said, "Should I go back and get the Rhino so that we can get across?"  Uhhhh, yea!  I'm not walking across that.  Of course, she didn't want to go across without the rhino either.  So, that's what she did.  We rode in a rhino (think John Deere Gator) across the water with her one year old.  In the top left part of the picture you can see an open area that they fondly refer to as the beach.  Kerrie, Justin and I sat there and talked while the kids played in the woods.  They had a blast getting completely muddy. 

And then the experience was upped a little bit.  Valerie used the bathroom twice in the woods!  BRAND new experience.  If you don't want to hear more about this then skip to the next paragraph.  However, I'm going to share the rest of the story so that we don't forget how fun it is to be a kid.  When she told me that she had to go I told her that she could just find a tree or ride back up to the house.  She was anxious to learn what I was talking about and so I walked her into the woods and taught her how it's done.  A while later the other kids came down to play on the beach.  I asked where Valerie was and they said she was using the bathroom again.  Too much water, I thought.  Well, when we got back home and undressed them for the tub I learned that it wasn't water that was the problem that time.  ;-)  Poor thing had to really go and thought that she had to do that in the woods too.  I felt so bad! 

After about an hour of playing, Kerrie offered to take us on the trails.  She told me that they had about 80 acres that had trails throughout.  Wow!  We pretend to live in the country with 10 acres....these people really have country living!  We all jumped in the rhino and off we went.  It was really fun.  The entire time we were riding the trails I was telling myself that I had to get rid of that city girl part of myself and embrace this country living.  And then we left to go home....

We arrived home and as I was pulling all of Valerie's gear out of the Durnago the kids went inside.  Oh, did I mention that I had been cleaning the house for company?  You know what I mean; mopping floors, dusting, vacuuming.  Really cleaning.  That's an important point!  It looked decent and we were having company in 3 hours.  I walked in and Kevin was LAYING on our new rug in the living room playing with his cars.  In his muddy, wet pants!  Valerie was just walking all over the house leaving a mud trail wherever she walked.  Before I started yelling I did think about the fact that if I hurt them too bad then we wouldn't get Jaden!  I was furious! 

Thank God Scott showed up quickly after this.  I was feeling very, very CITY at this point.  I even said, "If we lived in the city this wouldn't happen!  Who needs this country crap?"  Apparently, mud in the house erased all of the serenity that I had experienced at the creek. 

My sister was long gone by the time we got back home.  What I thought would be a half hour turned into an hour and 45 minutes.  We had to really hustle to get things back together for company.

I thought that I wanted our kids to go explore our property a little more this year.  Maybe staying inside the fence for another year will be okay after all! 

Signed,

A City Mom who's trying to go country!

A day to remember......

We've been celebrating for more than a week now, but today is actually Chinese New Year!  Today (in 45 minutes, actually) is also exactly one year since we conceived our third child.  And lastly, it was 14 years ago today that my mother died.  Quite a day, huh?

First, Chinese New Year!  We had the pleasure of celebrating with Jack, Jeni and Jasmine last night at our house.   Oh, and we also had Josie's picture with us!  What a wonderful family these folks are!  We had a great time.  Jeni brought a couple of books for us to read to the kids about Chinese New Year.  She also brought coloring packets that helped teach the kids more about this special holiday.  We ordered chinese from our local restaurant and enjoyed each others company. 

When Jeni and Jack arrived, Jeni handed me this as a wish of Good luck in the New Year.  It is tradition in the chinese culture to offer oranges or tangerines as a good luck wish!  This was so sweet and we appreciate her kindness!!   

2006 is the Year of the Dog.  We have learned a lot about this holiday and had a great time with our new friends.  That is until I received two pages to go see patients.  Thankfully, I didn't have to leave until just after 9:00. 

Going right along with that celebration is another special one.  It was one year ago that I sat Scott down and spoke to him about my desire to adopt.  You can read all about it by clicking on this link.  No one was more surprised than Scott and I that we had developed an overwhelming desire to add another beautiful child to our home. 

Originally, we thought that Jaden would be coming home in February but God had other plans.  And we (read: I) had to learn patience.  I think my lessons are going pretty well.  I'm hanging in there and waiting patiently for the opportunity to travel to the other side of the world to bring our third child home to meet her brother, sister, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins and scores of friends.  We're having a baby soon and I can't wait to have her home.

Lastly, it's been fourteen years ago that my Mom died of colon cancer.  It's hard to talk about sometimes because there's so much shame in admitting that sometimes I have a hard time remembering all of her. 

Today I took time during worship service to really remember her.  To think of her and see her.  And then I thanked God that he gave me a Mom that loved me so very much. 

Mom, I love you and miss you.  I wish that you could have known Scott, Valerie, Kevin and Jaden.  Actually, I would also have liked for you to have known me after I grew up a little bit! 

I pray that you knew how much I loved you, appreciated you and that I thank you for all that you did for me.  Mostly, I would like you to know how very sorry I am for all of my mistakes.  You did a million things right, Mom.  The mistakes that you made were lessons that helped me to find my own way.  Just as my mistakes will guide my children. 

Remembering you tonight and feeling your love!

~Traci Lynn

 

Pictures from Chinese New Year celebration last weekend...

These are our friends Christa, Tom, Sam, Adam and Dottie.  We met them last year after we decided to adopt.  Christa is the art teacher at the kid's school.  She and Tom brought their newest child home last fall.  We loved spending time with them at the party last weekend and are grateful for their friendship.  Sam and Adam and wonderful big brothers to Dottie! 

Dottie and Valerie ~

Dottie needed more space than Valerie did....but she was able to sit still for this one picture.

Bethel's January Student of the Month!

We are proud of our girl!  She was named one of Bethel's January Students of the month for Citizenship! 

She's having breakfast this morning with Mrs. Hollis, her principal.  This morning before leaving for school she said, "I've never done this before but I'll be all right.  I'll learn what to do."  You're right Baby, you're all right!! 

Mommy, Daddy and Kevin are so very proud of you!   Have a great day, Angel!  We'll have the special plate ready for your dinner tonight.

I love you completely!

~Mommy 

Here's some information that our agency sent out yesterday...

In keeping everyone abreast of all that I know, here is more information.  This  was sent by one of the coordinators at our agency to someone who is to recieve a referral today.  This will apply to our referral as well.  Good information to have.  By the way, TA means Travel Approval. 

"We asked a few questions of Nikki yesterday about the process and this what she wrote back to us:

The call will be the notice we have the referrals. Just so you know what happens, here is a brief rundown of how we process the referrals:

All referrals go into translation. Brief information such as name, birth date, general health status, orphanage and province are all translated first. Coordinators are then given a list with this information so we can begin calling everyone who received a referral while the rest of the information is being translated. When we call we have not seen any of the information except what is on the list, so that is all I will have in the phone call: name, birth date, general health status, orphanage and province. When we call we do give approximate travel time and the date we would like to have the acceptances back, this is usually in about a week from the time we call. Travel is still an estimated 6-8 weeks after referral.  The translations are worked on until everyone's is completed and then we prepare the FedEx shipment. Typically we are able to get the packets sent out the day after we make the call, so for instance if I called you on a Monday with the news, we would probably have packets sent out Tuesday and you would receive it Wednesday afternoon.

We do send everything we received in the packets so you will get all the original Chinese documents which will include blood tests, other medical work, developmental reports, and in some cases, immunization record. You will also get the pictures (typically two or three) and the translations we prepared. If the immunization record is not included in the referral information you typically get it in the paperwork you receive in China.

The arrival of TAs is estimated from the time your acceptance is sent back to China, not from when you receive the referral as some people misunderstand. The typical wait time is 3-5 weeks from the time acceptances are sent back. This is why we ask for a quick turn around on the acceptances. Once we receive TAs, travel is usually about 2 weeks later as we cannot finalize anything until TAs are in.

I always try all the numbers we have on file until I reach someone, but if you have a particular order you want me to call in, just let me know. :)

Sharing the excitement and information with all of you, Jaden's family, as I have it! 

Keep smiling everyone!  We're having another baby in our Maloy clan!

~Traci

Oh my what a fun day!

If I'm having this much fun today then I can't imagine what referral day will be like when WE are the ones receiving information on our daughter!

Many, many months ago (we're talking April or May) I talked with a lady in Troy who was also adopting through our agency.  We corresponded by email once or twice and then I lost track of her.  I didn't do a good job of keeping email addresses of folks I'd met back then.  Apparently, I was just too overwhelmed with all of the information that I was taking in.

Well, our paths have crossed again.  We're both using the same personal trainer for our workouts and our families are getting together this weekend to celebrate the Chinese New Year together.  Her LID is 4/29 and today is her referral day!  This morning I was able to watch the DHL website and track her referral package as it made its way from Beijing, China to Evansville, IN.  As of 9:41 AM her babies name, birth date and picture are sitting in our adoption agencie's hands. 

It is expected that FTIA (our agency) will start making phone calls later today to let these families know who their children are.  After the phone calls are made the agency will complete the translations of all of these babies files and then tomorrow they will overnight these to all of the families, including Jeni, Jack and Jasmine! 

Okay, so these aren't our babies.  I know that.  But, Jeni, Jack and Jasmine will recieve their packet of information about their daughter on Friday and will come to our house for dinner on Saturday!  We are so excited to share in their excitement and joy! 

I spoke to Jeni a little bit ago and she is so calm on the outside.  Yea, yea, she's been through this before, but I dont' think that's it.  She said that she still has a bit of a wall up....just in case.  We all wait sooooooo long on these girls.  What if?  What if....somehow.....her file was missed?  She continues to guard her heart just in case.  She tells me that once she hears from the agency then she'll be crying. 

She's being sweet enough to allow me to live vicariously through her!  I have to admit that all of this is really helping the excitement to build in my own heart.  I have to keep the wall up a little bit though.  We still have quite a way to go, but it is going to happen!   

We are going to have a baby in the house before too long.  I asked Kevin a little bit ago if he was ready for Jaden to be home.  I said, "Can you imagine a little one running around the house?"  His eyes got real wide and he had a big grin as he said, "Oh yea!  I can imagine it!" 

Looking forward to our referral day and enjoying celebrating our friends referral with them!

~Traci

Dear Jaden....

Good Afternoon Sweetheart! 

My heart is aching for you today.  I just want to hold you in my arms, rock you and sing the same song that I sang to your brother and sister when they were small.  I've been a little under the weather and during a short nap this morning I had a dream of you.  I was in the orphanage standing over your crib.  You were looking up at me and you smiled.  I picked you up and walked over to the rocker and we snuggled as I sang this to you:

     Hush little baby don't say a word, Momma's going to show you a hummingbird.  If that hummingbird should fly, Momma's going to show you the evening sky.....

What a great dream! 

We are all ready for you to come home.  We are just waiting to recieve word that someone has taken your picture and matched it to ours....forever!  That's when we'll pack our bags and come to bring you home. 

We continue to lift our prayers up to God for you, your parents in China, your friends in the cribs near you and your caregivers.  We have complete faith that God has lead us to adoption and specifically to you.  Our family will not be complete until you are home with all of us. 

Valerie and Kevin continue to be so excited for you to come home.  I hear of families who have children that aren't excited for a new brother or sister.  Rest assured, that is not the case in your home!  These two just absolutely adore you and look forward to playing with you and caring for you. 

We celebrated Chinese New Year last Saturday with the Dayton Familie's with Children from China group.  They had a slide show of all of the beautiful children.  They included this picture and caption in their show this year. 

Valerie and Kevin....waiting on their Mei Mei, Jaden!

The list of people that are waiting for you to come home is long.  I could never remember everyone, but please know that we are waiting in quiet anticipation for the day that our home can be filled with even more joy!

Love, Mommy

Jaden feels a little closer today....

It seems that another batch of referrals have been made.  Not 100% confirmed but enough information for me to believe that what we're hearing is true. 

The CCAA has matched dossiers from April 26th through May 13th, 2005.  That means that they are only a little over a month away from our log in date.  That's amazing news!  It feels so good to know that we're this close.  However....

This does not change my prediction at all.  Could we be matched in February?  Hesitantly, I'll say yes.  Is it likely?  No.  Okay, then what about March?  Could we be matched in March?  Well, yes.  But there are problems with that scenario. 

You see Chinese New Year is January 29th.  A very, very big holiday in China!!!!  Think Christmas here.  For the past two years the CCAA did not match any referrals in February.  They did two matches in January instead.  This week we are receiving the second batch of January referrals and that leads me to believe that we won't have matches in February. 

For the past two years the CCAA have matched like this around the Chinese New Year:  Jan 31 and Mar 17, 2005 and Jan 22 and Mar 10, 2004.  So, I think that perhaps May 14th through (let's guess) May 28th will be matched in March, 2006 and then the beginning of June will be matched in April.  That leaves us at the head of the line for May referrals. 

Do I like that scenario?  Heck no!!  Could they blow it out of the water and send me a picture of our daughter in February or March?  Yep!!  That would be great, but I'm not holding my breath.  I have no desire to deal with the depression that would come if I was wrong.  I'll plan for a long wait and be pleasantly surprised if I'm wrong. 

So, back to the beginning.....We are getting closer and closer and it feels good! 

Waiting to hold Jaden in my arms and sing to her...

Jaden's Mommy

I visited with Edna last night....

I went to see Edna last night.  Oh my gosh!  Could anything be worse than laying in a hospice bed, literally and slowly bleeding to death and there not be any flowers, cards or people in the room?!  I was in awe of the absence of all of that.  I love Edna so very much and am so grateful that we have had her as our friend for the past 5 years.  Who knew that one of our childrens favorite people could be a funny, 87 year old, food-loving sweetheart?  I'm so grateful to God for bringing us together.  I miss picking her up for church every Sunday.  I miss the dinners together.  I miss her smiling, happy face.  I miss her already and she's not even gone. 

She's so sad!  Quiet and sad.  I read to her from the bible last night and in the middle of a verse she said, "Will you turn Jeopardy on? It's 7:30."  Okay.....  During a commercial I asked her if she would like to talk.  She said, "No, I know what's going on and I don't want to talk about it."  I'll respect that, but I am surprised.   She's usually so verbal.  Impending death is something that we can't understand until we're there.  I'll go where she wants me to go.  So, we enjoyed Jeopardy together.

Edna's favorite food is lobster and so I am off to Jay's to pick up a lobster lunch and take it to her for her afternoon meal.  She loves lobster and I pray that it is yummmmyy!  We sent her a great big spring bouquet today to brighten her room.  I pray that these two things might help her to smile again.  Even if it's only for a moment. 

Edna asked about Kimmy and Jaden.  She had tears in her eyes when she said, "I won't be able to meet Jaden.  How is Kimmy?"  She has told me before that she would like to see Kimmy.  It's been tough for me to know what to do with that.  How do you ask your friends if you can borrow their daughter in order to make someone else smile?  What if they thought it was a wierd request?   But after this visit I talked with Wanda.  It sounds as though Wanda will take Kimmy to see her.  I KNOW that will make her smile!!  Oh, to see her smile again!

The bleeding is bad ~ they're changing the dressing on her neck 10-12 times a day and I'm guessing that her hemaglobin will drop to a dangerous level within a couple more days if this keeps up.  Her kidneys will stop and we'll lose our friend.  I'll miss her, but I'll be celebrating her homecoming to heaven.  I'll be celebrating her life! 

I love you Edna!

Traci

You know that the wait has been too long when I start buying Gymboree at FULL price!!!

The yahoo boards!  I blame the yahoo groups that I'm a member of.  I'm not a shopaholic by nature.  I keep that area of my life intact...usually!  I told Scott that I had clothes picked out online from Gymboree (READ:  The most rediculously priced kid's clothes store that I've been exposed to) and I gave him the opportunity to stop me, but he wouldn't get out of bed to look at the goods.  So, unchecked this is what I bought!

Only the four items on the right were full price, but still ~ I must be losing my mind!  I told myself a long time ago that I would not EVER buy full price Gymboree.  The lesson?  Never say never.  I have never waited this long on one of my babies! 

Click on the picture to see a larger view.  The two white shirts that are identical except for size (YES!  I even bought two that are the same!), say..."Picked with love."  Someone on the yahoo boards let all of us know that Gymboree had these available.  I loved them and dove in head first......buying not one, but two! 

Come home baby!  Mommy and Daddy are going to go broke! ;-)

Love, Mommy